There is a massive fear of failure that comes with writing. It’s a terrifying leap to go from saying, “I can write a book” to saying “I have published a book.” I worry that it will never happen. That I will spend my whole life re-writing and obsessing over this story and I will have no one to share it with. No one to pick up the manuscript and say, “I will publish this!” Or no agent that believes in the story enough to want to back it.
The things I keep asking myself, is it even good? Is it too much, or too little? Who else besides my closest friends and family would even read this? Would my closer friends and family read this?
I play a strong game with myself, the game of confidence. Outwardly, I can be extremely confident. Inwardly, I have days where I can keep up the strength and push myself to see the good in almost all situations. There is one category I have almost zero confidence in; getting my novel published.
Don’t worry Jess, it’s a good story
Don’t worry Jess, you aren’t even done with it yet. You don’t even know where it will go
Don’t worry Jess, if no one knows about it, no one will know you failed….
Yep. At the end of the day there is that silver faint lining. I will have a written book. I will have a 2nd and a 3rd and a 4th. I will, because if I don’t get this story written down on paper somehow it will drive me crazy. It’s like a have a mass of voices in my head that I have just have to share with the world.
I have one story, her story. And I want you to read it, I hope when this book is finished you will want to read it too.